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When Are You Expressing Too Much Anger?
When Are You Expressing Too Much Anger?
An angry word might not seem like a very destructive thing on the surface. But a word is indicative of an idea in your thoughts. If you make it a point to use angry, derogatory words to other people, the other party might wind up believing the words - so you wind up wrecking someone's day. In the extreme, if the other person becomes conditioned to believe your angry words on a daily basis, you may succeed in destroying someone's life. On the other hand, you may not be aware of the impact of your own negative words on yourself. By using angry words, you are developing a habit. And when you have become a habitually angry, unpleasant person then decide you don't like being that way, you will find that it may be too hard to change. It isn't difficult to start the process of becoming habitually angry - just get angry one time first. You will then find that the subsequent times you get angry will not be as hard as the first. Think of the first time you get angry as jumping off a bridge - taking that first step is always the hardest. But the subsequent steps get easier and easier. In short, you will eventually become addicted to getting angry. It will become an integral part of your personality. If you like, a therapist might be able to administer certain psychological tests that will determine how intense your feelings of anger are, whether you are inclined to getting angry, and how good you are at managing anger. But even without such tests, you are probably well aware of it already if you have a problem managing anger. When you realize that you seem to go out of control when you get angry, which is a frightening occurrence to the people you live with, it could be advisable for you to seek out help so you can cope with your anger. Anger management expert and psychologist Jerry Deffenbacher, PhD, commented that there are some individuals who are more prone to getting angry than most people. This means they find it easier to get angry and when they do, they express it more intensely than normal people do. Other people are perceived to be always grouchy and irritable, but these individuals do not express their anger overtly. People who find it easy to get angry may express their anger by becoming physically ill, sulking, or through social withdrawal. Certain psychologists characterize people who find it easy to get angry as possessing a low tolerance for frustration. This means that such individuals feel they should not have to experience frustration, annoyance or inconvenience. People like this are especially incensed when they perceive their situation as being unjust to them. Such people became that way because of different factors. They might possess genetic or physiological features that caused them to be more sensitive, irritable, and temperamental than other people. Or perhaps sociocultural values might have been ingrained in easily angered people, teaching them that anger should not be expressed. For example, it is more expected of men to display overt anger than for women to act that way. Women still get angry but society deems it less acceptable for women to show overt anger, because men are identified by anger and women are not. So women display their anger in more subtle ways. This type of person may then not be able to learn how to manage anger or channel such an emotion in a positive manner. Another factor is family background - people with anger issues were usually brought up in families where emotional communication is not stressed.
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